And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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