is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
