Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
