I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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