I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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