exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
