i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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