you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
