I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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