your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
