I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Randomize
