Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
