please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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