hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
