Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
