I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
