is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize