apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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