Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
