Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize
