I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
