Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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