I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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