He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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