Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize