Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Randomize
