Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Everyone says I win the strip club
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
