This is not my ceiling
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
