When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Randomize
