i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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