We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
