they need to just BURY HIM!
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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