So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
