Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
