Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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