she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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