Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
