his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize