Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
