I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
