May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
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