what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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