Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize
