problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
thus making me awesome and them whores
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize