I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
As shirtless as possible
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
