It was confusing and full of hummus
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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