Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
