I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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