I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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