hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I had to cum in my sink.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
